Bible Quiz

At youth group last week we started creating a bible quiz game. Most of the questions are really simple, nothing like what the serious quizzers are expected to answer. Did you know they have quiz meets and rules just like any other extra-curricular club? I hate to admit it, but those guys would take me to school in a wagon.

If you spell it, it's OK

Since I was a kid, my family has played Scrabble. I've never been good at it myself. But every game brings out words that make people blush. I mean, if my Mom has the letters for sphincter, you better believe she's gonna use 'em.

Sugar Frosted Flakes

When I was a kid, I was put on a sugar-free diet because of a chronic cough. For the most part, I managed OK, but when it came to breakfast cereal I was one sorry little boy. Perhaps the worst part was that all the boring cereals didn't put toys in the box - a double whammy! Oh, pity the poor, poor little Midwestern boy ...

Underwear shopping is not an intergenerational activity.

I'm pretty used to seeing skin thanks to the multi-media world in which we live, but I suspect shopping at Victoria's Secret is still a bit of an overload for most guys.

We're all wimps.

Seriously, when we were working in Mexico, there were 15-year-old boys that were pushing wheelbarrows that I was afraid to attempt.

Mexican masonry

When you get a bunch of non-bricklayers laying bricks (or blocks in our case), the results aren't what I might call "up to code". But the Mexican foreman allowed us to do a less-than-perfect job, and encouraged us all the way.

I just need to carry a 3rd shoe just in case ...

When I started working with youth, I realized the universal truth that if a frisbee or ball get stuck in a tree, a boy will ALWAYS throw his shoe at the object to get it down. And, if the shoe gets stuck, he will throw the other shoe. Only when the second shoe gets stuck will he consider other alternatives.

Physical labor is good for the mind

Whether mixing concrete, shoveling concrete, carrying concrete in buckets, or wearing concrete on my skin and clothes, my mind kept returning to thoughts of how lucky I am that this isn't what I do for a living.

Safety before fashion

I went with our church on a mission trip to Reynosa Mexico last week and despite hurricane Dolly, we still built a concrete block house for a family that was previously living in a plywood shed.

Birthday comic.

When puns come into my head, I just can't resist. If you think reading them is bad, just be glad you don't live with me. It's a non-stop punapalooza. If you actually like this comic, why not go to FindingElim.com and forward it to a friend for their birthday?

Mondays Off

I guess one of the perks of being a pastor is having Monday off. Of course, that doesn't always happen, and I doubt if many pastors actually keep to a 40 hour work-week ...

Having a Pool Potty

I just found out what a big deal it is when a swimmer leaves a soggy log. Did you know everyone has to exit the pool and it takes a half a day of chemical treatment to make the pool safe again? When I think of all the nasty water we used to play in when I was a kid it's a wonder I survived.

Playing with the sacrament

If you've never at least thought about sticking those little communion glasses in your eyes, then you've never been a kid forced to sit in a pew for a whole church service. I mean come on, even my Dad did it to get a laugh.

Dream Girl

Every once in a while I see some parent driving a car that was obviously decorated for their teenager. To me, it's just too funny - but then I'm easily amused.

I am My Doctor's Boat Payment

I actually went to a doctor recently where he "shared" his interest in boats and Porsches with his patients. I gotta tell you, I like to dream, but I don't want to be reminded that I'm actually financing someone else's extravagant dreams. The high price of healthcare is a real problem in my opinion, and is one of the most serious catalysts in the ever-widening gap between the classes. I could go on ...

Selective Hearing

I guess we all suffer from some amount of hearing only what we want to hear ...

The Unpopular Word

There are some people who say what everybody wants to hear. There are others that say what needs to be heard. Guess who gets the vote.

une boîte de vin s'il vous plaît

A box of wine please ...
The older I get, the more traditional I get. That's why I'm disappointed by the whole screw-top acceptance. From synthetic corks, to screw tops - what's next, your favorite merlot in a handy Capri Sun pouch? I know it's inevitable, but if I don't have something to gripe about, what kind of old guy will I turn out to be?

For Mom ...

I don't know why, but my biggest pain as a kid was making my bed. I figured out that if I asked my Mom to "show me" how to make it, I didn't have to do it myself. Hence she demonstrated several times before that little scheme wore itself out.

Undesirable Alternative

Our church is adding new bathrooms, and let me tell you: it's about time.

Looking a little pale?

New pastor arrives

Early Sunday Morning

Forgiving Trespasses

Zoe's costume isn't cutting it.

The Church Lady

Cinnamon Toast Communion